Dear Maggie,
Why do people use expressions like: Work like a dog, dog-ugly, wag the dog, dead as a dog, sick as a dog, lazy as a dog.... I don't get any of them, except maybe the last one.
Daisy Dog
(Toronto, Ontario, Canada)
Earth to Daisy,
Who the hell cares? Listen to me poochie, when humans talk like that they show their ignorance. True, they gave us the frisbee and for that I'm grateful, but generally speaking most people I know are dumber than trees. What you really ought to be worried about are the boneheads who ascribe THEIR dopey traits to us. We're DOGS for crying out loud! Get used to it.
See you in the park.
Dear Maggie,
I recently ran into an ex-girlfriend. I dumped her ten years ago because I realized I wasn't attracted to her anymore. The problem is now she's a total bombshell and I haven't stopped thinking about her since we reconnected. The other problem is she has a husband. I know. I'm a dirty dog. Should I keep my nose out of this one?
Fickle in Fresno
(Fresno, California, USA)
Dear Fickle in Fresno,
I hear you bro. I KNOW where you're coming from because I've been there myself (it was a border collie with a glint in his eye and a deliciously lolling tongue). But you know what I got for my trouble? A slap across the nose with a rolled-up newspaper, that's what. We have a rule here in dogland. Never chase the other dog's stick and, if you do, be prepared to take the consequences. So frankly, I'm torn. The mature canine in me says take a cold shower (or have somebody throw a bucket of water on you). But the randy old bitch in me says go for it. Let me know how you make out. And, yeah, you ARE a dirty dog.
